You know what scares me about dying?
The dreams past
that point at
which
you can't wake up.
There's an event
horizon i
n your li
fe's geodesy,
toward the end, and when
you cross i
t, you can't go back. After that
point, much less remains in your control than... ever before.
You want to think
there
are limits to human suffering? I want to
think that, and there must
be. But let's not kid ourselves: the toll
at this tollbooth can be as steep and loud as you've
plausibly seen anywhere.
But apart from
all that imagine
you are in a
nightmare, and the nigh
tm
are goes worse than wo
rse.
O
nly you can't be asking to wake
up. You're waking
down. You're fal
ling into a gra
ve an
d
there
is no po
ssibility o
f cli
m
bing. Y
ou will ch
ok
e o
n di
rt or mud too slowly.
It's terri
fication. Li
fe i
s an unpleasant and someti
mes surgi
cal mystery.
-
The dreams past the point at which you can't wake up.
There's an event horizon in your life, toward the end, and when you cross it, you can't go back. After that point, much less is in your control than... ever before.
You want to think there are limits to human suffering? I want to think that, and there must be. But let's not kid ourselves: the toll at this tollbooth can be as steep as you've plausibly seen anywhere, plausibly - at least in theory.
But apart from all that imagine you are in a nightmare, and the nightmare gets worse and worse. Only you aren't asking up. You're waking down. You're falling into a grave and there is no possibility of climbing out. You will choke on dirt or mud, slowly.
It's terrible. Life is an unpleasant and sometimes surgical mystery.
