I'm afraid of being

a creep.

If someone sees a darkness

you might have

does that mean your soul is dark?

I see you see

that I'm imperfect,

and I already knew.

I want you even though

you might not want me

at all.

And because I am a guy that's creepy.

Or it could be, couldn't it?

I don't know how to promise

you without talking about it directly

that if anything I'm at your service.

Sometimes I feel creepy

only because I like you.

Anxiety blows that up,

and I'm more terrified of

this situation than anyone.

I'm scared of you because I like you

and your opinion matters,

and I'm scared of me because

I don't seem to be good enough

to seem any better than a creep.

And I'm not a creep,

so that's a real failure

of honesty somehow.

Shyness isn't always easy,

but I don't think it's bad.

Actually, much as it can hurt,

I seem to like my shyness better

than everyone who rejected me.

It's seen as a demerit, unsexy, or creepy

when mixed with real anxiety about myself

and whether someone wants to interact.

But I see it as difficult and meaningful

and even impairing

but also beautiful.